Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Not by the hair on my chinny chin chin!

So I am sitting in my car, doing my makeup in the visor mirror. And I see, glistening in the sunlight, these two.. lets call them what they are.. chin whiskers. Not blond hairs, not fine downy lanugo, but straight up now tell me black, "3 little pig" chinny chin chin whiskers. Now this is not the first time they have sprung up. One time actually we were in the car headed somewhere important and again, I saw them in that dang car mirror. I didn't have any means to tweeze and after many failed attempts with my nails my husband got them. WITH HIS TEETH! I am not even kidding. This is from the man who once told me as I was going to the bathroom with the door open, "We're not there yet". Yes, that is true love AND true disgustingness. Sorry if in any way you ever thought I was cute and this has ruined it for you :)

But, if you as a female deny you have creepy random hairs, you are a LIAR. And if you really don't think you have any, come talk to me. Ill point them out for you :)

Anyway, back to the real story. And that is, once again last night before work, I had no means to tweeze. I found some nail clippers and made some attempts at cutting? Wrong. I only accomplished pinching my chin twice and creating two crescent moon cuts. Now not only do I still have whiskers but I have added wounds. Awesomeness.

Also, when I was walking in I saw a van with those family stick figures on the back. They had violently peeled of the Dad in what I'm assuming was a bitter divorce. Burn.. But funny none the less.

Little update on one of my previous posts. I had once mentioned I would remain 160 lbs for life and was lamenting about that. Be careful what ya wish for. I am no longer 160 lbs. I am more!! Woo hoo!!!! Ugh.. I don't know if its the birth control or the Halloween candy but I'm about to stock up on hoodies and pajama pants.. And if I gain any more weight on birth control I might as well get pregnant and weigh the same!! (No Zac, this is a joke. Don't get your hopes up)

Poor Zac. Weeks ago I made a comment that I would have another baby if the Cardinals won the World Series. Um, epic fail. I mean, come on. I really thought that was a safe bet.

The boys had a blast trick or treating this year. They are both at great ages and oh so cute. Zac turns 35 and is starting walking on his boot this week. We are SUPER close to moving home, and the Holidays are right around the corner. Ahh.. Aside from me turning into a fat man with a goatee, LIFE. IS. GOOD.